


Guess Every Superhero Need His Theme Music

by TeraKaren



Category: Batman (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: Bat Family, Gen, Preboot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-09
Updated: 2016-03-09
Packaged: 2018-05-25 14:56:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6199432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeraKaren/pseuds/TeraKaren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dick may be a fan of Kanye West.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Guess Every Superhero Need His Theme Music

**Author's Note:**

> Something I wrote years ago based off this headcanon from [Incogneat-oh](http://incogneat-oh.tumblr.com/post/36666396745/dick-knows-every-word-to-every-kanye-song) on Tumblr: "⚡ Dick knows every word to every Kanye song."

For someone who could sometimes even sneak up on him, Grayson was insufferably loud.

“I’m, I’m sky high. I’m, I’m sky high,” Batman chanted as he swung menacingly in the shadows of Gotham’s tallest buildings

Did Grayson even know what a disgrace he was?

Probably.

Damian sneered.

—

“Bye Junior. Tell the big bad Bat that I say hi,” Cat woman said with a coy smirk before she strutted her way off the building.

“Get that look off your face Hunk Wonder,” Oracle’s voice came in through his ear piece.

“What look?”

“The ‘I just ran into a sexy woman in a cat suit’ look,” Oracle replied matter-of-fact.

“She digs the Bat costume.”

“She’s out of your league.”

“She don’t believe in shootin’ stars, but she believes in shoes and cars. Wood floors in the new apartment, couture from the stores department,” Batman sang cheekily.

“Good thing she’s into Daddy Warbucks then.”

“Ouch. You sure know how to ruin a mood Babs.”

“That’s me. In the ring they call me Mood Ruiner. Now if you’re done, there’s a mugging on 5th.”

“On it Babs.”

—

Dick adjusted his Ray Bans as he walked toward the entrance of Wayne enterprises, grinning as he pushed through the press.

'Like we always do it this time. I go for mine, I got to shine,’ he sang in his head, looking at the seductively dressed reporter from Channel 5 over the rims of his shades appreciatively before walking into the building. He was always up for putting on a show, even if it was spoiled Gotham prince.

“Good morning Mr. Grayson,” the building receptionist said pleasantly when he walked through the doors.

“Good morning Summer. Just bringing the boss man coffee.”

Summer nodded at him as he stepped into the elevator. He hummed to himself and rocked on his heels until he reached Tim’s floor.

He passed Tim’s receptionist with a friendly wave and she buzzed him into the office. Tim was just waking up from his desk with the assistance of one Tam Fox. He was bleary eyed with a piece of paper unsticking itself from his cheek as he arose. He looked first at Tam in his immediate vicinity and then to Dick near the door. He immediately closed his eyes, leaned back in his chair, and straightened his tie. Dick smirked at his not-so-apparent-but-obvious-to-him embarrassment.

“What time is it?”

“About 9:30,” Tam answered, a little concerned.

“9:30?” Tim looked at the time on his tasteful, but expensive watch and then up at Dick who held up his coffee.

“Oh, OH! I was supposed to meet you for coffee. Sorry, I got caught up working on the latest Neon Knights project and I lost track of time.”

Dick walked forward and set the coffee down on the desk.

“It’s OK. You’re burning the wick at both ends these days, Little Brother. So I figured that could be a reason you did not meet me this morning”, Dick said with an uncertain smile, leaving all other reasons unsaid. Tim was...colder to him now than he used to be. “That’s why I brought the coffee to you.”

“Dare I ask what the other reasons could be?”

For a split second Dick gave Tim the nondescript, emotion simmering beneath the surface look that his family did so well before smiling wide and walking between Tim and Tam.

“Well you could be spending your morning with your brand new fiancé. Congratulations, but I can’t believe you told the press before you even told your dear big brother TimTim,” Dick said with a smirk and ruffled Tim’s hair as Tam looked away embarrassed.

Tim pushed Dick’s hand away from him, disgruntled.

“You know that is just a rumor and you know why Tam said it.”

“Sure, of course,” Dick said giving Tam an appraising look, still smiling, and throwing his arm around her shoulders.

“Well, welcome to the family Tam, where we like the girls who aint on TV 'cause they have more-”

“Please don’t finish that line,” Tim said with exasperation while Tam giggled and moved further into Dick’s embrace. Dick hugged Tam close for a second before letting go and walking toward the door.

“I’ll leave you two love birds to it. Rain check on that coffee Tim?”

Tim shook his head and smiled at Dick.

“Sure. I’ll call you. Well, when I find time between my busy desk nap schedule,” he said with a crooked smirk.

“Then it’s a date.”

—

Jason was still brushing his teeth when he heard a knock at his door. Toothbrush still in his mouth, he picked up a gun and looked through the peephole on his door. Upon seeing who was on the other side, Jason lowered his gun and yelled “Go away Grayson!” before heading back to his bathroom to finish his morning routine. When he walked back out Dick was sitting on his couch, bringing his fingers down and up as he waved at Jason.

“My, you are looking lovely this morning Jason,” Dick said through his grin to Jason’s not-at-all-amused expression.

“Get out,” Jason grumbled.

“Not gonna happen.”

“Get out now or I’ll shoot you,” Jason said, this time with a little resignation.

“Not until you give me back Damian’s music player.”

Jason looked surprised for the four seconds it took him to remember that he could be gloating instead.

“I forgot about that thing. The little demon throwing a hissy fit?” he said smiling smugly. Dick shook his head.

“I told him to get a new one, but he still glares at me like he thinks that I know where it is.”

“You do know where it is.”

“I know that you have it. I don’t know where you put it,” Dick paused for a moment, “why did you take it in the first place?”

“You erased every song off of everything I own and replaced it with Kanye West’s 'Homecoming’,” Jason sneered, “real subtle, by the way.”

“Hey! That is a great song! Kanye is a visionary,” Dick emphasized with a dramatic point of his finger, one that moved his entire body.

“Whatever. I’m not giving you the runt’s toy back so you may as well go,” Jason said crossing his arms and walking toward his stove.

“Fine,” whined Dick, “If you don’t want to help a brother out, I’ll just be on my way.”

Jason waved him off without even looking back. Dick frowned and walked out of the door. Jason had just finished peeling an orange when his whole body stiffened.

“That was too easy. Dammit!”

He did a quick scan for bugs (and found one he didn’t know about, but definitely not one of Dick’s) and checked to make sure that all of his guns were still where they should be. Dick only had five minutes alone at the most, but this was Dick and it was a whole five minutes! In the middle of checking that his bullets were all mostly there, he heard a noise coming from his pantry. Familiar notes played, causing Jason to close his eyes and breathe in deeply through his nose.

_'Do you think about me now and then~’_

Jason opened his pantry and reached for a can of peaches on the top left side.

_'Do you think about me loving them~’_

He tapped the lid solidly near the rim, causing the lid to tilt down and leave half of the can open. He reached in and instead of pulling out an electronic device formerly owned by the young Damian Wayne, he pulled out an unfamiliar cellphone that was playing, of all thing’s, Kanye West’s Homecoming. Jason wanted to throw the phone against the wall. He refrained long enough to answer the phone.

“Cause I’m coming home again! Cooomiiiing home aga-” Jason ended the call before Grayson's obnoxious voice got a single word more in that damn song. Jason squeezed the phone, willing it to break, but of course it didn't. The thing was a brick. Instead he just set the phone down and walked away. He wouldn't let Dick get in his head. He'd rather eat nails then let that happen. 

Later, when Jason was eating his orange with toast and a cup of tea, he would start humming absently until a “Maybe we can start again” would come murmuring out of his mouth followed immediately by cursing.

That night he shoved the phone down the throat of the unlucky leader of a human trafficking ring.


End file.
